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Every week, one of us picks an album and all four of us has to review it. It’s not necessarily a new release, just something that one of us is into. This week we’re reviewing “Snakehouse” by The Cliks.
Here’s the album art and track listing (links are to youtube videos of songs):
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Check out the reviews after the jump…
At the start of a new year everyone likes to make resolutions. It is very easy to say you are going to accomplish something when you know you still have 365 days left to put it off. I don’t know what kind of time you put into the whole resolution process. Some people take it pretty seriously; they really want to buckle down and get some shit down, which is fine. Other people make up some bull-shit thing and then don’t follow through on it. Actually, pretty much everyone gives up. Anyone remember your resolution from last year? Well, I do. It was to keep rocking constantly. I failed for about 45 minutes overall, but the other 525,555 minutes were no problem. Yeah, I know, what about the 175,184 minutes I spent sleeping? Well, I had rocking dreams and nightmares. But, anyway, it’s still a bull-shit resolution no matter how you slice or dice it.
You want some actual advice? You want to really be inspired? You want to truly change your life? Look no further than the theme song to American educational television program Arthur on PBS.
Prepare to cry your eyes out because you’re about to witness something spectacular:
Let’s break it down in a SmartassRadio lyrical breakdown.
It’s the last day of the year! It’s the last day of the year! Everyone is getting drunk tonight! Everyone is getting drunk tonight! Party time! Party time!
But first, let’s look at some statistics. Once again the state of the art research team here at SmartassRadio.com has compiled the top 50 Google searches of the year. This is a yearly tradition. We’ve been compiling this info for decades, but we only post the list when we’ve made it. Otherwise it’s pretty irrelevant, you know? Well, the first time we made it was back in 2008. I admit we didn’t cut it in 2009, sadly- it takes a strong man to admit when he’s been beat. The good news is that the SAR research report shows that we have once again made the top 50! We’re sitting pretty at #39! Excellent. Here are the top 10 Google searches of 2010, the rest of the list is after the break.
1. Chat Roolet
2. katy perry boobs elmo
3. Avatar: Last Air Bender
4. alison brie boobs
5. Circuit City
6. val kilmer boobs
7. # 食べログ
8. sofia vergara boobs
9. Who is BP?
10. Michael Jackson tour 2011
Congratulations to Katy Perry and Elmo for making it to the top of the list!
In my previous post I discussed four criteria which make up the ideal romantic partner. Of course, because I was describing an ideal, I was also describing an impossibility. In my eyes a dream girl/guy would be very funny, extremely attractive, have genius-level intelligence and be as loyal as a lark. In reality, candidates are bound to fall short in at least one of those categories, usually at least two. I fall short in all four.
But hold the phone! My goal is not to discourage people! As Built to Spill’s first album’s title told us: There Is Nothing Wrong With Love! What is wrong is having ridiculous expectations. In this second part, I am going to reveal my second system of romantic qualification: S.A.F.E. (again, this took about 4 minutes of development and is undoubtedly flawed). The S.A.F.E system outlines my qualifications for what constitutes an appropriate partner to pursue romantically. While the F.A.I.L standards will only end in disaster, the S.A.F.E criteria should lead you to a happy and healthy relationship. Let’s begin:
I’ve found that making up systems is pretty easy. It must be one of those human impulses, to find a sense of logic in everything. Of course none of it is true. I don’t really buy into many systems of thought used to explain human emotions. For example, maybe you’ve heard of psychological term “displacement,” which is an unconscious defense mechanism whereby the mind redirects affects from an object felt to be dangerous or unacceptable to an object felt to be safe or acceptable. So, when your Mom loses her job she comes home and beats your Dad. OK, I guess we can use a term to describe that emotional reaction- but I’m always a little wary of these things. The same goes for dream interpretation. Yes, I think dreams can tell you things, but sometimes people can be too quick to apply a simple system of logic to the infinitely more complicated processes of the psyche.
Having said that, here’s a system I’ve developed (in about 4 minutes) to describe the intricacies of love (feel free to comment on the variety of flaws and over all under-development in the comments). I’m calling it the F.A.I.L-S.A.F.E system of romantic development. Let me explain:
The system is divided into two parts. The first, F.A.I.L., outlines what I imagine to be the ideal person to start a relationship with and then explains why this person cannot exist. The second, S.A.F.E, offers a more realistic set of qualities to pursue in the opposite (or same) sex.
We proudly present to you the second in our “Collective Criticism” series. This week we have three reviews of the recent collaboration between alt-rock guitar heroes Omar Rodriguez-Lopez and John Frusciante. It doesn’t seem to have a title. Also, it was picked by Felix.
Hey everyone, I got reminded tonight that I don’t agree with opinions you find on the website pitchfork media, which I will not link to. What happened was I had just finished reading DJ’s most recent post, which I have no problem linking to, and I clicked the link at the bottom. It brought me here. From there I went here. Both those links provide the general sentiment of our staff toward those…those…I don’t even have a word for what they are. I will settle for dickforks.
Anyway, tomorrow (today for you) is pretty much Pitchfork’s Christmas: the one day they can express their criticisms on the entire year. Yep, it’s Pitchfork’s release of their 20 Top Albums of 2010. Notice the difference in rhetoric employed in my title versus theirs. Top of what? You own list? Let me check the definition of “top” as an adjective. OK, they probably mean this one: foremost, chief, or principal. Those guys are so obsessed with their own opinions of themselves. Whatever, this isn’t about them; this is about me.
I plan on drinking tonight by the way. It’s a Thursday night- the only reason I’m doing this is that Pitchfork’s silly numbering shit comes out tomorrow and I want my opinion out first. Also I want to predict what Pitchfork’s list will be and see if I’m close. I think it will probably look like this:
10) No Age, 9) Ariel Pink, 8 ) Robyn, 7) Deerhunter, 6) Big Boi, 5) Joanna Newsom, 4) Arcade Fire, 3) LCD Soundsystem, 2) Beach House,1) Kanye West
