Diddy Ruins Notorious B.I.G.
I realize there are a few flaws in this post. First, no one cares about my opinion on the subject. Second, it should have been written in 1994. In any event, this is what you get today.
I just got into Biggie recently (totally excellent coincidence with the movie release). I downloaded the discog and I actually really love most of it. I always thought I disliked him for some reason, but I guess I don’t. Tupac’s music, on the other hand, I hate with a burning passion. I find Notorious B.I.G. to be, for the most part, clever and really fun to listen to, which is exactly what I want from hip hop. However, there is a glaring defect in almost every song: Sean Combs.
You can probably put any hip hop artist on the left and this would hold true.
Not surprisingly, he’s also the reason I can’t watch the Bad Boys of Comedy unless it’s on DVR or HBO On Demand. Diddy is essentially a mush mouthed, hip hop version of Gene Simmons. Alright, that may be a little harsh, he doesn’t have Sean Jean coffins or lunch boxes (yet), so I almost have to take that one back. BUT, what does this idiot think he’s contributing? Did he produce the beats? I legitimately have no idea, so if someone could let me know, that would be great. My understanding is that he’s almost purely a business man.
The worst part about Diddy is his stupid backing pseudo hype man bullshit. If he threw down some verses then fine, by all means – god knows he needs the practice. But that is next to never the case. Instead we’re treated to little mumbled asides throughout a song. Lots of “yeah”, “c’mon”, “Bad Boy”, “(insert year)” and it’s really, really distracting. Below is the best transcript I could do (in one shot) of his track in one of Biggie‘s most well known hits, “Juicy” (I dare you to read this and listen to the song at the same time. After you do, this gibberish will be the only thing you hear when you listen to it.):
True
yeah yeah yeah
so good aye yo
yeah
c’mon, nigga
yeah yeah
uh
mnuhmm
yeah yeah
wussup?
That’s right it’s all good
yeah uh huh it’s all good
yeah uh huh it’s all good
it’s allll good
it’s alllll good
it’s all good nigga
yeah
uh
yeah
c’mon
yeah, spread love
yeah
uh
that’s right
it’s all good
nah
yeah
uh huh
uh huh
yeah c’mon
what? Yeah
ohhh yeah
that’s right
it’s all good nigga
c’mon
it’s all good
it’s allll good
it’s all good nigga
it’s alll good
something about a coast and something about something fat
ahhh
all good
hehe
that’s right
yeah yeah
c’mon nigga, c’mon nigga
that’s right
it’s all good nigga
money something
it’s all good
somebody nigga
it’s all good
shit right
it’s all good
it’s allll good
so good
yeah
don’t stop
yeah
money hoes and clothes
bank rolls
yachts
porn stars
haha
god
biggie smalls
it’s all good nigga
jr mafia
it’s all good nigga
bad boy
it’s all good nigga
it’s allll good
that’s right ’94
and on and on
and on and on
it’s all good
Now that I think about it, I realize why I never gave Biggie a shot:
Well dressed? Sure. Good rapper? No. Good dancer? Really no. I also love this video because I feel like Sting has no idea what to do with himself. They should have given him a bass at least.
