[Petey Boi is a longtime friend of SmartassRadio.com and he's finally decided to contribute! He'll be doing movie reviews in his one-of-a-kind style from here on out. His first review is of the new Will Smith movie Seven Pounds - DJ]

Hello internet world. I’m Pete Marsh and I have the privilege of doing movie reviews here on smartassradio.com. I just wanna write a disclaimer before embarking on my review of Will Smith’s movie. I love all movies, except for two, so probably my reviews will only focus on the positives of movies. Secondly, you should know I am an expert and have been hand selected by the creators of smartassradio.com to review movies. This means if you disagree, u should know that your wrong and email DJ and/or Roy your hate mail. But if you really don’t like my opinions, I’m sorry, sincerely sorry and without further a due, SEVEN POUNDS!!!!

I went into the theatre knowing nothing of this movie. I only heard it sucked from one person at work but decided to watch it coz there was only 2 hours till I had work and it was the only movie I could see at that time. I went with my housemate, Payam…who is the man, and we had no idea what we were getting into. One piece of advice for people who will go see this film, bring your girlfriend, go alone, under no circumstances do u want to go with ur buddies to see this. So back to the movie, as I watched and munched down chocolate cookies I snuck into the theatre…totally metal if I say so myself…I became very confused on what was happening on this giant screen. There were various storylines goin on simultaneously and I was left completely clueless in my comfy seat. First, the Fresh Prince is happy, smiling, and with his wife and in the next scene, out of nowhere, Willy boi gives a blind dood a call where he acts like a complete ass…me sayin ass online also shows how metal I am…where he verbally abuses this poor blind man becoz of his handicap. Where is this going???? Go watch and find out!!! But believe me there are more bizarre things that go on and the film keeps you in the dark until the end.

But let me get back to why you should not go to SEVEN POUNDS with your bros, if u r, indeed, a bro. Near the conclusion of the movie it gets really emotional. I’m not one to cry during movies except for Old Yeller and maybe Million Dollar Baby, but this movie gets up there. So let me set the mood for you, Payam and me are watching, confused and lost, and then the movie goes from confusing to OMG this is really sad. However being the bros that we are, when things jumped to super sad, we turned and looked at one another and let out an awkward laugh. I mean I probably wouldn’t cry if I saw it alone or with a hot broad…unless it would help get me laid, what a miracle that would be…but I do have to say it was sad and put a damper on my mood going into work, but in a good way if that makes any sense.

So all in all, I liked the movie. It’s confusing but very entertaining. My official rating of SEVEN PouNds is a 7. With a 1 being Blair Witch Project and 10 being Bring it ON!!! KIRSTEN DUNST IS F#@#ING HOT!!!!!!!!! I have a thing of Kirsten, which is metal??? But I don’t want to give away any more of the movie to the 3 people who probably will ever read this, so go, drink some beers, spend 10 bucks, get some popcorn, and a lot a bit of cherry coke, watch the movie, and then come back to smartassradio.com and tell me what u think of it. I’d love to hear what my people have to say. Alrighty doods that’s it for my first movie review, hope ya’ll enjoyed. Toodles!

Your American Hero,
Peter P. Marsh III

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