Hello everyone. Many people, particularly those who live nearby water, have heard of an animal called the osprey. You may have even been lucky enough to have seen one of these birds of prey in action. Osprey’s are very cool and they are certainly a species that everyone could use more information on. To help inform the masses on these exciting animals I’ve decided to write this post. This is “In The Know” with Roy and this week’s topic is ospreys.

An osprey in a diving position.

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Our Senior-Paleontology Expert Dan Scully recently painted a fairly spine-tingling portrait of the latest prehistoric fiend: Predator X (re: turtleshark). I have been a big dinosaur fan ever since my youth and, like many others, I have always found T-Rex to be a pretty stellar example of what Darwinism was capable of. Still, I am not one of those dinoholics who refuse to take T-Rex off his pearly pedestal. I admit there are carnivores much more vicious and gargantuan (look no further than our senior-paleontology expert Dan “Skull-Crusher” Scully). However, one dinosaur that certainly won’t be usurping anyone, except maybe the giant squid and Nessy, is Predator X. Why? Because he’s a sea monster and sea monsters are only scary to avid swimmers and pussies (often the same people).

As Jurassic Park III showed us there are already more ferocious dinosaurs than the Rex.

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Wow! Long time, no see! Right? Am I Right? (Rhetorical).
Hope everyone had a great weekend, I know I did. What was particularly fun about my days off was the amount of psychotherapy I was able to fit in. Most weekends I literally get  ZERO psychotherapy done, but this weekend I was able to get a whole bunch. Truth be told, I think I’ve come to a breakthrough. My therapist has diagnosed me with multiple-personality disorder. Boring right? (Rhetorical). I thought the same thing, until she explained further: I don’t just have two or three personalities. I have twelve…and they each correspond to one of the playable characters from the original Super Smash Bros. video game for Nintendo 64.

Which personality to choose…

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Dear Universal Studios,

Hello. First of all, I’m a huge fan. I just had a quick suggestion, concerning your Jurassic Park franchise. It seems like you guys were fine with just wrapping that up as a trilogy. I mean you could do that, but why not just pull a “Star Wars” and go for the saga? I know it’s hard to think of movie ideas. I know. But, TA-DA, I solved that problem for you! Here are three guaranteed oscar-worthy Jurassic Park ideas. Feel free to use them, no charge. Seeing these cinematic masterpieces come to fruition would be enough of a reward.

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