We don’t have much to be proud of at smartassradio.com: we have a horrendously designed site, no motivation to update it, and I’ve done nothing but lose money over the course of it’s lifetime on the Internet. Most disappointingly, no one looks at smartassradio.com. But today we finally have some site statistics that make me smile. Is my SEO work paying off? No. Did I finally get that long lost AdSense check? Nope. Are more people listening to the podcast? A resounding ‘fuck no’. Nay, today isn’t about accomplishing goals. It’s about the absurd search terms that brought a handful of people to the site this morning.

Behold:

This is a list of search terms that brought people to the site today.

best looking pussy – 4 views
fighting irish – 3 views
carmen electra no clothes – 2 views
best looking vagina – 2 views
urkel – 2 views
egyptian girls – 2 views
cheddar – 2 views
fighting – 2 views
irish – 2 views

That’s a hell of a list.

I’ve been hanging out with Regis Philbin a lot recently and he has been chatting my ear off incessantly over his favorite college football team the “Notre Dame Fighting Irish.” I happen to be a pretty Irish fellow (50%), and if you need more proof than just genetics consider this: last St. Patrick’s Day I watched a parade in Cork, Ireland, got drunk off Guinness, saw old men with brogues play jigs with fiddles and woke the next morning to kiss the Blarney Stone. I’m sure I ate a potato and got in a enormous brawl somewhere in the middle of that too, so rest assured that I am familiar with Irish stereotypes. But you know who isn’t familiar with mass generalizations? Theodore W. Drake, designer of Notre Dame’s Fighting Irish Leprechaun Mascot.

Who is this schmuck?

Read more »