There is a ton of evidence stacking up against me and it’s high time I acknowledge it. I’m becoming a piece of white trash human garbage. In the four years since I’ve left High School, I have absolutely let the semi-freedom of college destroy me as a person. While, I’m very comfortable with the latest incarnation of me, I think it’s important to look back at where I came from.

Here’s the earliest picture of me on Facebook:

Look at this sweet boy with his girlfriend enjoying a delicious lollipop after a day at the mall. Oh, look he has a Metallica cap on. You bought it where? Hot Topic? Precious.

I dare you to follow the jump and keep reading.

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I just made my first transaction on Live Nation, which is trying to merge with ticket sales overlord TicketMaster (CEO: Money grubbing Guns N’ Roses, Van Halen, Steely Dan and NEW KIDS ON THE BLOCK manager Irving Azoff). Remember like a year or so ago when you would go to buy a ticket it would sometimes bring you to the old school order and if it was a pre-sale you would go to LiveNation? Fucking stupid, now they’ll be the same company. Anyway, I just bought a pair of tickets to see Protest the Hero (rawk!) in May. I have to say the Live Nation site was pretty intuitive. When I searched for the tickets I was able to easily find them and, much to my surprise, they were only sixteen bucks! That fuckin’ rules – I would have shelled out 25 if I was asked to do so. What follows is a harrowing tale of trivial amounts of money, deciet and a broken (and just fucking broke) young man.

Bag of shit.

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Here at the SmartassRadio offices, we love giving each other advice. Whether it’s about that rash on Roy’s inner thigh or Chachi’s battered liver, we always figure out the right solution to whatever’s ailing us. We decided to extend that courtesy to our readers. It started as medical advice, but clearly a few of our readers missed the point. You can email your own questions to DJ@SmartassRadio.com or Roy@SmartassRadio.com

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According to this AFP article (I can only imagine AFP stands for Associated Fucking Press), 119 college presidents and other big wigs signed some gimmick asking for the legal drinking age to be lowered. Of course, some soccer mom has a huge problem with it, because she doesn’t understand how great booze is.

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