Hello everyone,

I have to say that I am very happy to be back writing for SmartassRadio. Writing these blogs is like keeping a diary and in a few weeks I’ll have a time capsule of my past couple weeks on the internet. Today I am going to try something that the late, great poet Frank O’Hara used to try. Frank O’Hara’s poems are pretty good in my opinion. He was a gay guy and would take the ferry over to Fire Island a lot. He would do things like write poems for a poetry reading on his ferry ride TO THAT VERY READING. In fact, the ferries that cross the Great South Bay aren’t very long. Pretty much like fourteen minutes only. Not a lot of time to get the creative juices pumping.

What I am striving for at the moment is something that is similar. I want to write a blog post in fourteen minutes. That is all the time I have right now, and frankly it is now or never. I’ll tell you right now that it is 4:49. Do you consider that fast marksmanship?

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Hello everyone, happy two thousand and fucking ten. In case you didn’t get the MEMO let me give you the low down on what two thousand and fucking ten is all about: A) Never Giving Up, B) Keeping it Lively, C) Bringing Your A-Game and D) DJ Is Going To Write An Album.

With those pointers in mind, let me now let you in on what this blog post is going to be all about. In this blog post, my first of two thousand and fucking ten, I am going to: 1) Refute Some Ongoing Rumors About My Identity, 2) Convince You To Never Give Up, 3) Illustrate How You Can Best Keep It Lively, 4) Explain What Bringing Your A-Game Is All About and 5) Inform You on How To Write and Record an Album Through Eleven Difficult Steps.

And BREAK!

That’s what people say in football once they have highlighted the main points of their next move and are now ready to execute the plan, right?

OK, LET’S GO!

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I passed a bowling alley today and noticed that attached to the building was a very interesting looking store. It was called the “Pro Shop.” Now, I consider myself to be a pro in most aspects of life so, naturally, I walked inside to see what was the dealio (pro-talk for ‘situation’). Much to my chagrin (pro-talk for the sudden embarrassment upon realizing I am a bowling ball store ) I found that I was not in a pro store, I was in a bowling ball store. Whoever came up with the audacious idea to start calling bowling ball suppliers “pro” must have been a real marketing genius, but I think its high-time that this practice be ended.

There are only two pro things about this picture

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Here’s a quick news report from the desk of SmartassRadio news headquarters. The New York Times has recently reported that SUNY New Paltz (the college which I have graduated from and DJ lives near) has seen a tremendous surge in enrollment in recent years.  The article wrongly proports that this increase  is due to the so-called “shit bucket economy.” Well if that doesn’t scream MARLARKY at you, frankly, I don’t know what will.

I’ll let you in on a little secret: New Paltz is getting more students for one reason and one reason only, and you’re looking at it (I’m referring to our website).

The Key to Increased College Enrollment

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